Fauxlaroid

Inspired by this post at Sweet Eventide, I bought the ShakeItPhoto app for the iPhone. It is supposed to simulate a Polaroid photo. You can take pictures while you are in the app, such as this photo I took of my cat:

You can also choose photos already in your iPhone photo library to fauxlaroid, such as these photos I took the other day: 

Looking forward to warmer seasons, I also used the app on a photo I took last year:

The ShakeItPhoto app is 99 cents, but I think it's worth the price. So far, I'm really enjoying it.

Writing

As I waited quietly for the woman at the information desk to get off the phone, I breathed in the atmosphere.  The second floor is my favorite part of the bookstore, with its conveniently placed cozy chairs and quiet corners.  I was secretly happy that the section I needed was on the second floor.

When I asked the woman where the writing section was, some voice inside me repeated the important part of my inquiry with a certain amount of reverence: Writing.  

The writing section of the store turned out to be one tall bookshelf, narrow enough that I could stand in one spot and peruse all of the writing books available.  I looked over the selection once.  And then again.  And I went back to some shelves a third and fourth time.  Occasionally, that inner voice would again whisper to me:  Writing. 

I’m not sure what I’ll write.  Or how often.  Or if the used book I bought on writing will complement my urge to write.  Yet I do know that some part of me misses writing, craves a creative outlet, and wants to write more often. 

So, I will write.  Because the urge to write is calling out to me, insistently and seductively. 

Google Buzz, Privacy, and A Disturbing Problem

There's a lot of buzz about the privacy concerns of Google Buzz. I don't want to re-hash the concerns already brought up (here's a link to some if you are interested), but I have noticed something that I haven't seen anyone else mention. And it's scary.

I don't want to use my last name on Buzz, so I unchecked this box while editing my profile:

But there's a problem with unchecking this box.  Whenever I want to post something on Buzz or comment on another person's post, I get a pop up.  Part of the pop up (the part which doesn't show my name and picture) includes the following:

The first time this happened, I thought it was strange, as I had already set up a profile. The only option that will let me make a post (a buzz?) is by clicking 'save profile and continue.'  However, after I do this, it changes my options. I only know that my options have changed by going back to edit my profile. When I do, I find this: 

This has happened several times since I got Buzz on the 9th, and it is a consistent, and disturbing, pattern. If the box is checked, I can post freely.  If the box is unchecked, the only way I can post anything is to agree to save my profile.  Yet, by doing so, it changes this privacy setting.  Essentially, what seems to be an option isn't an option.  I'm hoping it's a bug, but, even if it is, it's a nasty one.

I am much more than a number

Several years ago, I was walking along a path overlooking the beach, when I came upon four men sitting by the path.  As I walked briskly toward them, wearing my workout clothes and sweating, they looked at me, and then they looked at each other and smiled.  When I got directly in front of them, each man held up a sign with a number on it.  They rated me.  More precisely, they were rating my appearance, on a 1-10 scale.

Not all individuals are as blatant as these men were, but the memory is a stark reminder to me that I am, like women everywhere, judged and rated by my appearance.  I don’t particularly blame these men (other than thinking they were a tad tactless and rude).  Rather, I see these moments as being an example of the intense focus we have on people’s, particularly women’s, appearance in America.

Let’s fast forward to January 1^st of this year.  I decided to join a Health Challenge, and my motivation was, indeed, health.  I want to be healthier. Eat healthier. Work out regularly.  Be as strong and as able bodied as I can be. My goals weren’t about weight or size.  Rather, my goals were focused on health-related behaviors.

And then I bought a scale. 

I thought having some measurable way to see if a healthy diet and lifestyle were affecting me was a nice step.  I usually use how my clothes fit as a guide, but having a scale appealed to the numbers nerd inside of me.  I had already started to use an iPhone app, Lose It!, to track my diet and exercise, even though I felt a tad conflicted about the name of the app, given that my goals weren’t directly associated with losing weight.  

After buying a scale, I started weighing myself before breakfast every morning.  Here’s where it got complicated.  Because the scale?  It told me I was 2 pounds lighter after two consecutive mornings of weighing myself!  And I was 1.4 pounds lighter the next day.  I re-calibrated the scale again and again, yet it told me the same thing each time.  I was losing weight.  More weight than I’d expected to lose so quickly. 

After four days of weighing myself, I posted this on my twitter account:

After a full week, I was 5.6 pounds lighter than I had been the week before.  People keep telling me it was great, but I wasn’t as excited.  I knew I was focusing my attention somewhere that wasn't particularly healthy for me. I had started, like so many people, to focus on the weight, to focus on the number.  

Yet we aren’t numbers.  I’m not the number on that scale any more than I’m the numbers those men assigned me. 

Let’s face it:  When we focus on the number, we aren’t focusing on health.  We are focusing on thinness. We are focusing on appearance.  And there are a thousand ways to be thin that aren’t at all healthy.  And there are another thousand ways to be 5, 10 or 15 pounds heavier and be healthy. 

You see, when I focus too much on my weight, I start making less than healthy choices.  I’ll go hungry or eat the less nutritious food that’s fewer calories.  I’ll also potentially tie myself up in knots about being a certain weight.  Self worth based on my weight?  Well, that’s simply a crappy life to live, and I refuse to live my life that way. 

So, I’m going to stop focusing on the number.  I’m going to remember my New Year’s resolution and make healthy food and lifestyle choices.  If other people want to focus on their weight, I will support them if it works for them.  I don’t, however, think it works for me.  Focusing on my weight only makes it more likely I’ll make unhealthy choices. 

And the good news?  I’ve made a lot of healthy food and exercise choices since January 1^st, and I’m proud of myself.  I’m also planning to keep up the healthy choices until the end of the challenge (February 28^th) and beyond. 

As a final note, I know some of you are wondering, so I’ll tell you the ratings I got from those four men on the path:  6, 7, 8 and 9.  Beauty, after all, is in the eye of the beholder.  We aren’t all the same, and we aren’t all attracted to the same thing.

Thank goodness.   

A healthier me in the new year?

I've been thinking about making some changes in my life, and I'm wondering if using the energy of the New Year, including all the other people making resolutions, would help. I don't usually make resolutions, but this may be the year.

In particular, it has occurred to me that having a community to support me in making some health-related changes could be beneficial.  It'll likely also help me keep my resolutions longer than I might otherwise.

With those things in mind, I decided to take part in John P.'s Health Challenge 2010.  From his blog, here are the rules:

1. Eliminate as much sugar from your diet as possible. No more candy, cake or cookies. You are allowed Two otherwise illegal candy bars per week IF you follow all of the other rules.
2. No sugary drinks like Coke (here’s why) or alcoholic drinks (huge calories)! In fact, nothing but water, unsweetened tea or coffee to drink! You are allowed Two otherwise illegal drinks per week IF you follow all of the other rules.
3. Decrease food portions by 30-50% for all meals. Instead of eating whatever portion you are given, slow down while eating and stop after you feel full.
4. Snack all you want, but only fruit, veggies or nuts are allowed!
5. Exercise at least 5 times a week. This doesn’t mean long exercise daily! It means frequent bursts of exercise. Pushups and situps a few times a day for example.
6. Publicly update the rest of us and encourage others to keep going! (Twitter, Facebook, etc.)

The challenge lasts from today (January 1) to February 28.  Wish me luck!